We had the most beautiful sunrise on Monday morning.
I’m not an early bird, nor a morning person, so it’s not the usual for me. This was a good day for it, though.
Monday was the first day back to school after winter break. My kids had been home for three weeks. As any parent will tell you, that’s a long, long time.
School breaks are a mixed bag for me. I have very little alone time. Between the noisy screen time and the sibling squabbles, I have trouble focusing on anything. But I do not underestimate the joy of going off schedule. There’s no need to hassle the kids to march to the weekly drumbeat, so I allow myself the same leeway. I wake up late, stay in PJs, eat lunch at 2pm, and play video games. I am far less effective at chores when others are loafing around, anyway. It’s much easier to go with the flow. It’s a school-age version of “sleep when the baby sleeps.” Besides, I think it’s good modeling for the kids. My value set includes serious downtime.
I did keep us alive and somewhat clean, and the kids did do some chores, but I let the bar lower itself into the ground. I was done with sweating the small stuff, especially with Omicron escalating and events canceling all around us.
If you had told me back when I got my second Pfizer shot last spring that this winter would be screwed anyway, I would have fallen into a full depression spiral. I had my post-Covid hopes absolutely pinned on this holiday season. But by the time mid-December rolled around, reality had blunted my reactions. Between all the ups and downs of exhilarating vaccination, the Delta buzzkill, anti-vaxxer stupidity costing human beings their lives, the relief of getting the kids their shots, and now Omicron, I had seen enough to know that not only are there no perfectly happy endings - right now, there are no endings, at all. When large get-togethers folded into themselves and vanished, I wasn’t frightened, or depressed, or even angry. Covid has been normalized. When it rains, you put up an umbrella, cancel the picnic, and shrug. When the latest variant is about three times more infectious than the prior one, you upgrade to an N95, cancel the holiday party, and…shrug.
For a moment it felt like resignation. Should such awfulness be met with more fury, no matter how long the awfulness continues? At the first Women’s March after Trump’s election we chanted “THIS IS NOT NORMAL! THIS IS NOT NORMAL!” I’ll never forget that steadfast truth which I evoked many times since, trying to keep sane as the world fell apart in never-ending ways, over and over again, year after year.
But understanding our current reality and making a difference where we can isn’t giving up. Does “normal” mean “acceptable” or “common”? Many terrible things are common. My more nuanced version of the chant would be “This is a bad thing that continues to happen, so let’s do all we can to protect ourselves and others without losing our shit!”
It’s not resignation, it’s resilience. Getting knocked down, getting back up, dodging one punch before getting knocked down again, but staying in the fight. I can’t say I’ve ever called myself resilient. I can’t say I knew what it felt like before. I’m more likely a Chicken Little, running around freaking out, getting scared when I can’t see a happy conclusion headed my way.
Things feel different, at this moment, anyway. On Monday, I stood in the pink-orange of this magnificent scattering of light and allowed myself the space to feel the promise of new beginnings. Who knows if our school will be shut down by the end of the week? Will we have to return to remote learning, and again face all the related stresses? Even if Omicron does actually peak soon and disappear, will a new 2022 variant make all of this seem like a tea party? Is there ever such a thing as a new day?
Sure, I thought. Just look at that sky.
Headphones
Being Jewish in December
The Only OK Violence
Battlebots is back.
If you don’t know - Battlebots is a robot fighting league that has had various TV iterations. I’ve been following it since its first broadcast twenty years ago. Back then, modified lawnmowers spinning blunt objects at serious speeds would slowly creep towards each other, hit exposed wheels a couple of times, and then die.
These days the competition is much more robust.
The hits are so hard that these 250 lb monsters are launched into the air. Even more impressive, they’re built so reliably that they can come crashing down at odd angles without dislodging wiring or belts and continue dishing out damage.
We were lucky enough to attend tapings of Battlebots a couple of years in a row in Long Beach. Seeing this amount of raw power in person is incredible. We were all set to go again in 2020, which was delayed like everything else. They moved operations to Las Vegas, and we were sad to miss it. I can’t wait to get the chance again.
Sometimes it is incredibly fast and brutal. (If you want to see how momentous this win was, watch the hype in the first part of the video.)
Sometimes, it’s incredibly innovative and wacky, with wildly entertaining results.
I can’t oversell this show. It’s got so much going for it. Builders are usually teams, often families, and their stories are inspiring. Some are flashy showpeople, some are nerdy scientists, but all are passionate and committed to their craft. The bots themselves are the ultimate STEM demonstrations. Watching them meet in the box displays all the questions of machine design and performance. Weighty armor or speedy maneuverability? Unexpected weaponry that exposes drive mechanisms? Defensive design keeping others at bay vs the ability to get up close and personal with your own spinning bar of death?
Anyway - if any of this interests you, check it out, it’s on Discovery, and hit me up for post-bout discussion.
Audrey Commission
She had me make Tiny Pancakes.
Each one is about the size of a dime, complete with syrup and butter. They were real, which is much easier than sculpting or sewing. Then she tried to leave them out for the birds to eat but they just got rained on.
Ok yeah that’s it, I’m finally publishing something. I hope all y’all are doing ok, weathering the continual downpour of not-great news in this bizarre world.
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See you soon.
Canceling everything around the holidays was tough but we didn't see we really had any choice. Maddie's at risk as are my employers. I'm lucky enough to have a work space that's beautiful and I'm all by myself. And good for you in taking a bit of a vacation too with the kids. This idea that everyone must go go go go all of the time has caused so many problems in our society. I'm hopeful for the new year but there doesn't seem to be much to grasp onto right now.